May I Make A Suggestion? Sacrifice

For me, the linking of Christian holidays with “pagan” holidays is genius. In ancient times, December 25 was the date of the winter solstice, an Egyptian holiday celebrating the sun god. The winter solstice is the shortest day of the year, marking the start of winter, and it is about 90 days from the spring equinox. Halfway through the winter, when I am just about done with the darkness, I, along with other Christians/Catholics move into the season of Lent, where we go deeper into our belief and understanding by committing to a 40-46 day fast. There are various cultural interpretations and traditions for the Lenten season. In the UK, they eat pancakes on Fat Tuesday (the day before the fast begins) in remembrance of times when families solemnly ate the last of their winter store of sweets. Louisiana is the only US state where Mardis (fr. Tuesday) Gras (fr. Fat) is a legal holiday, and they party hard in preparation for the season of fasting and penance. King Cake, anyone? In Brazil, the beauty of Carnival is the epitome of, “Turn Up!” The word, Carnival is derived from a Medieval Latin term meaning to take away or remove meat. In my younger years, I totally missed the point of the preparation and focused solely on the party aspect of the season. I never connected Mardis Gras with fasting. I connected it with getting wasted all weekend through Tuesday in New Orleans and recovering from the overindulgence on Wednesday. Now, twenty-five years after I left Louisiana, Ash Wednesday has a different meaning. I still have to recover from Fat Tuesday (ya heard me?), but it is also the day of commitment.

For the next forty-six days, I will fall into myself. I began fasting for Lent about fifteen years ago. I started out by giving up one or two of my addictions; coffee, potato chips. Each year, I held a sense of pride when Easter Sunday arrived. I did it! Around six years ago when I was searching for greater meaning in my spiritual life, I placed my focus solely on the four gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. If I was claiming Christianity as my set, I wanted to read every word that was written about Jesus and more importantly, every word that he said as remembered through the oral tradition before it was written down. I started the reading track on Christmas, daily reading a chapter of each book and journaling about something that spoke to me. That year, I gave up animal products, sugar, caffeine and fried foods for Lent. I finished the book of John very close to Easter Sunday. I entered Spring fully renewed in my heart and my body. That was the first year that I fasted from all meat. That Easter Sunday, I made a ham, Cornish hens, a cold-cut plate and beef, queso dip. I really enjoyed all meat products. Each year following, I cut meat from my diet during Lent. After a few years of this tradition, a sister-friend in Georgia sent me a text and asked, “What if we don’t stop?”

“What do you mean?” I replied.

“What if we don’t break our fast? What if we just stop eating animal products for good?”

I was immediately on board. Some of the rewards that I noticed in the forty-odd day fast was a clear and focused mind, renewed energy and joy. Giving up animal products in exchange for life, was worth it. So, for a year and a half, I was a vegan. Then I went to visit my family in Louisiana for two weeks…I had high hopes and what I thought was a dogged determination. Ha! On the third day of smelling my auntie’s signature breakfast of bacon, sausage, ham, buttered toast, grits and eggs, I abandoned my veganism for salty, fatty, rich and delicious childhood memories that did not disappoint my tastebuds. From there, I dove into all of my previous pleasures, fried chicken, milk chocolate, grilled cheese, and my mind was satisfied. I didn’t get immediately sick. I find that it doesn’t work that way. I am fairly healthy so my body simply takes what it needs from the stores of nutrients that I possess. It starts with a short temper, minor body aches, and fatigue.

Since that time, I have been in and out of my healthy eating. I have been in and out of prayer. I have been in and out of my mind. I did not fast for Lent in 2020 following a half-hearted attempt in 2019. This year, I am ready to commit and sacrifice because I want something from God. More than just the superpowers I heard about during the Great Conjunction, I want the courage to walk in my purpose. I want faith to replace fear. I want to unlock doors that I cannot see. I do not know the traditions of my West African ancestors, but I know that Jesus stated in Mark 9 that some demons can only come out by “prayer and fasting.” Some new translations omit the word, fasting, which I think is a sad case. People should know that there is power in fasting. The word, demons, turns some people off, but I define my demons as fear, worry and complacency. I fast to bring clarity to my life.

Along with removing animal products, sugar and processed and fried foods from my diet, I am also fasting from social media, and ratchet Hip Hop music (which I love). I am dedicating a half hour each day to studying ancestral worship and history; a half hour for meditation; a half hour to realizing my big dreams; and a half hour to prayer. It’s amazing how much time I free up by removing the distractions that serve my addictions.

My fast started with a three day juice cleanse. I am writing on the third and final day. A shout out to pressedjuicery.com. The company made it easy for me. I did the Cleanse 1 and Cleanse 2 bundles for the first two days. Today I will have smoothies and vegetable broth. Every time I think about the food that my mind wants, I am reminded by my heart that this is a sacrifice. I am cleansing my mind and body so that I can hear from God. It works. I am working from home and after my W-2 work is done, I soak in a warm bath and usually get right in the bed. I limit my time in the kitchen to reduce temptation. Three days in the bed ain’t gonna hurt, besides, it may take about that long to repair the damage I inflicted on Fat Tuesday. Oh, I turned up.

Over the next forty-four days (I maintain my fast on Sundays), I will give alms, pray and fast. I am confident that I will hear what I need to move forward in life and kick down some doors. I am taking action. Faith without works is dead.